Couples Worship God at the 2011 Marriage Retreat

Understanding Marriage part 1
By Jay and Barb Shelbrack

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Understanding Marriage part 2
by the Garcias, the Chiappettas, and the Economos

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Understanding Marriage part 3
By the Rodriquez’s, the Fellis’, and the Parlours

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Understanding Marriage part 4
By Jay and Barb Shelbrack

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Listen to all four parts of our two-day marriage retreat above or view the notes from the lessons below.

Understanding Marriage – Outline from 2011 Marriage Retreat

Understanding Marriage part 1

It’s Only Love
By Jay and Barb Shelbrack

What is the purpose of marriage? People come together because they have needs. Marriages are not just based on an agreement. If we don’t learn to love, the taking destroys the marriage. The book “Whole Marriages in a Broken World” was recommended.

Genesis 2:18
Adam and Eve are created. God is love. So God wants relationship. It’s not good for man to be alone. God did not design us to be alone. Do you love your animals more than your spouse? Leading, cleaving and weaving is what happens in a marriage. Marriage was intended to be free and trusting in the relationship–no walls. Yet when trust is broken, it is replaced with control.

Genesis 3:1
The serpent deceives Eve and Adam. Adam was right there when Eve ate the forbidden fruit. Challenge is to trust God’s simple direction and obey him. Do you trust God? If not, then it’s pride–you want to be in control. The temptation is to become like God–to be in control. Are you trying to control your spouse? Then you don’t trust God.

People don’t often think alike as newly married couples. Each person takes from different worlds and tries to reshape the person in their image. This causes conflict, since baggage is brought in from the past. Godly approach is to help each other do things God’s way. Learn to give and take. Do you always have to have your way? It’s not about control, it’s about humility. Ask what is right for your family.

Proverb 1:24-27 and Proverbs 19:20 show that we need to get a lot of advice. Discuss with patience. Pick your battles.

How do we try to take control? When things are disunified, one spouse can get more aggressive while the other backs off. This drives couple further apart. Learn to give each other space and respect. Be secure with God. Does your voice go up and get intense when you want to take control? Be humble.

Genesis 3:7
See the effects of sin: when we bring sin into the relationship, there is a shame, and a withdrawal from God. Don’t try to hide and deceive. Be vulnerable. Confess sin. Ask for forgiveness and give forgiveness. Otherwise you hurt others. Don’t blame each other. Adam blames God and his wife. Don’t give up on your marriage. Take responsibility for it. Men need to lead and direct in righteousness and humility. Get the help you need. Joshua said “As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.

Why did God have marriage? New sin gets revealed when you get married. So marriage is to help you get to heaven. Sin has to be dealt otherwise you harden your heart and go back to evil ways. The closer you both get to God, the closer you get to your spouse (like a triangle with God at the top). Once you accept the blame for the sin in your marriage, then you can repent and change.

Forgiveness must be genuine. Must “let it go” in your heart. In not dealing with your heart, you can often get busy in other projects. So don’t be busy at the expense of relationship with God. Put the expectation on yourself to be godly.

Repentance brings unity. How bad do you want to love God? Do you pray and study the Bible with your spouse. Men need to lead in humility and in Bible study with their wife. Build a godly foundation. Be open with your spouse or there will be a wall between you both.

Ephesians 5:25
Understand God’s plan with marriage and you will understand God’s plan with you. The church is God’s bride (Revelation 17). You can relate more to how God sees the church if you are striving for a faithful marriage. Pray and fast for your marriage.

Understanding Marriage part 2

Help!
By Juan Carlos and Betty Garcia

Hebrews 12:7
Endure hardship as discipline. God is treating you as sons. Trouble comes no matter what. If you don’t obey God, you make it worse.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one–help each other in your marriage. Bitterness comes from unwillingness to work together in the marriage. When trouble comes, your finances can be impacted. A series of bad situations can tempt you to focus on self. You can be tempted to forget about spouse and God.

Ecclesiastes 7:14
God makes good and bad times. You can’t understand it all. Be grateful for the support and love in God’s kingdom. Be faithful.

Ephesians 5:28-30
Love your wife as your own body. Care for spouse. We are called to not be selfish. Don’t try to do everything by yourself. This makes things worse.

Come Together: Hospitality and Family Devotionals
By Joe and Denise Chiappetta

Hospitality: Being generous to guests
Need guests. 1 Peter 4:7-9. What does your social calendar look like?
It doesn’t have to come naturally; you can learn to be hospitable. Is there a sin behind your lack of hospitality? Enjoy life; it is fun to be generous.
V. 7 Be clear minded and self-controlled.
V. 8 Love deeply. Plan to love others, it will cover their sin, it is a rescuing mission
V. 9 Do it without complaining. How can I bring the bible alive? Make that your heart.
Be prepared to serve/be hospitable.

Practicals:
Have fun
Have kids help out
Well stocked cupboard
Have 4 easy, affordable meals-keep ingredients on hand

Family Devos
Deuteronomy 6:7 Talk about God all the time. Everything can be a teaching moment.
- Sing a short song.
- Pray
- Props!
Talk about a bible story and relate in a way a child can understand

Can’t Buy Me Love
Finances, Trust, and Submission
By Nick and Jacque Economo

Malachi 3:8
Don’t rob God. It’s an issue of faith to consistently give to God. Give your pledge to God regularly. Be disciplined in your finances. We give out of gratitude.

Luke 5:1
In the miraculous catch of fish, Peter could have been prideful–he was the experienced fisherman. Peter had the heart to obey because Jesus said so. Then he saw the miracle. Then his life is changed forever.

There are things in life you need to give up to grow in God’s kingdom. What are you willing to give up in order to surrender to God? Allow God to refine your character. Trust that God will give you what you need.

Luke 18:28
What are you leaving behind for God and his kingdom? He will give you more that you give.

1 Timothy 6:6
Be content. You need food and clothing. The desire to get rich is a trap. Get rid of financial growth expectations. If you are discontent with your finances, and always want more, it can drive you away from God. Are you content with your life?

Psalm 37:3-4
Trust God and he will give you the desires of your heart. What God has in store for you is better than your plan. Your financial giving is a reflection of your trust in him.

Understanding Marriage part 3

We Can Work it Out: Revolving and Resolving Conflict
By Dave and Bernadette Rodriquez

End the cycle of hurt, pain, denial, anger and isolation in your marriage. You need to break it down and look at what the reasons are. Personalities might clash. One may be laid back and the other may be more active.

Philippians 2:3
Consider one another better than yourselves.

Communication can create conflicts if it is not done with consideration. Clarify with humility. James said to let your yes be yes and your no be no. Accept where each other is at. Be self-controlled about your anger. Don’t talk over each other. Grow up and be an adult.

James 1:19-20
Be quick to listen. Responding righteously is the disciplined response

Romans 12:18
Promote peace in marriage.

1 Peter 3:6
Don’t rebel against authority. If you do you are prideful and fearful. Consider Sarah with Abraham.

Ephesians 5:33
Do you respect your husband? It is a command of God. When you are fighting each other, you see your side. But do you see God’s side?

Galatians 5:15
Fighting and devouring destroys marriage. Put childish things aside.

Isaiah 53:5-6
By Jesus’ wounds we are healed. Do you have the guts to be a man as defined by God? It is the husband’s responsibility to lead godly in the marriage. This brings healing.

1 Peter 2:19-25
Unjust suffering in your marriage is commendable. To this you were called because Christ suffered for you. How does God feel when you mistreat his daughter?

Psalm 55:19
Men will never change their ways if they have no fear of God.

Proverbs 20:10 and Matthew 7:2 Get godly perspective on judgment from God. Forgive and do not retaliate.

Proverbs 18:13
Don’t answer before listening. Don’t try to fix everything. Be gently and patient.

Proverbs 16:21, 16:23 16:24
How to speak: you can bring healing by what and how you speak to your spouse. When in a fight, pray for wisdom.

Proverbs 12:16
Overlook offenses.

Proverbs 18:24
Be friends!

Got To Get You into My Life: Winning Couples
By Anthony and Lisa Fellis

Matthew 28:18-20
Make disciples of all nations. Be evangelistic in your marriage. Go after other couples.

1 Corinthians 9:22
Develop interest in other people’s lives. Become all things to all people. Have quality time with other couples: outings, dinners for the sake of the gospel.

1 Peter 4:9-11
Hospitality is huge. Change your schedule to make time for other couples. Use your gifts to help move people along in their Bible studies. Serve in strength that God provides. Don’t stretch yourself too thin.
Favorable to growth and development is another definition of hospitable. Meet needs and care for others. Welcome others into your home and build family. Be creative–you don’t have to be perfect. Look for deals to be frugal.
Build relationships between your kids and the kids of others.

Acts 16:14-15
Lydia offered hospitality to Paul and the disciples. Lydia was persuasive. Target their interests. Do these things and in the end you can win them over for God!

John 15:12
Lay down life for others and love as Jesus. That’s what Jesus did. Pray and fast for couples you’re building friendships with. Sacrifice and share your life.

(Don’t Be) Helter Skelter: Be The Spiritual Family
By Roger and Kama Parlour

Genesis 3:20
The heart of God after Adam and Eve sinned: God clothed them.

2 Timothy 3:10
If you are living the life of a disciple you’ll be persecuted. That’s how you’ll know you’re doing what is right. Timothy learned scriptures from infancy–from his mom. Goal is to have a spiritual family. Your home life should be a reflection of your outside life. This is the result of sincere relationship with God. A spiritual home is where God is worshiped daily together. It’s a home that loves God’s church and is committed to the ministry. Spiritual family is where children have their own times with God. It’s a home where everyone knows their roles. The family is prayerful. Husband leads in loving faithful manner and wife is nurturing and submissive.

Matthew 5:13
Spiritual family is the salt of the earth. Satan smashes relationships. Jesus says a spiritual family will be the light of the world–a city on a hill. It must be led by spiritual parents. You can’t teach your kids what you are not living. Be genuine in your love for God.

Six Areas to Become a Spiritual Family

1) Prayer

Luke 16:1
Pray and not give up. Be a family of prayer and pray for your kids daily. Satan wants to take down your kids. Our defense is to pray. Pray with your kids. That’s how they learn who God is. They can learn about our dependence on God and how to be vulnerable. Pray with faith and authority.

Ephesians 3:20
God can do more than we can ask or imagine. Take your kids and imagine with them.

John 15:7
Ask whatever you wish and it will be given. Be specifically about your prayers. Be pure in your life, in your marriage. Don’t flirt with sin.

Philippians 4:12
Be content in God. Families go through a ton of emotions, that’s why you need to pray together. It will bring a spiritual perspective to the emotions. When relationships in family get bad, people can lose hope. Daily prayer with kids will help them understand what it is all about. Teach kids to pray for the countries to be evangelized. Pray for people by name, including your kid’s contacts (friends and teachers).

2) Discipling Times

Matthew 28:18-20
Be passionate to get and give discipling. Do everything you can. Call around the world for help when needed. Teach kids to call disciples for input. Pick faithful disciples to be in their lives.

Look for open doors–opportunities when they are vulnerable to help them. Before bed is often a great time to talk. Listen to your kids. Make the most of every opportunity.

Have weekly special times with your kids, individually. Talk beforehand with spouse about what the kids need spiritually. Be consistent in that time.

3) Family Devotionals

They should be fun, creative, and addressing spiritual needs.

4) Devotion to God’s Kingdom

1 Peter 2:17
Be grateful for the church, with a positive, joyful attitude toward God’s church. If you communicate negative attitudes about the church, they won’t want to be part of the kingdom.

Incorporate others into your family time. But also set aside special time just with kids. Get involved in their school. Sometimes you can take vacations with other families in the church.

When you search for advice, you never know who God will bring into your life. Be willing to travel wherever needed to help your kids have faithful relationships.

Make sure conflicts are quickly resolved. There’s no excuse for a bad attitude in your heart. Call kids to apologize.

5) Evangelistic Lifestyle

Matthew 28:18-20
Kids need to see you share your faith. Teach kids to look people in the eyes when in conversation. That is respect. Get into your community where your kids are so you can reach out to people there. Have people to dinner, and pray with them too.

6) A Home where Children Are Having Their Own Quiet Times

Teach kids to read the Bible and pray from the heart. Help them develop a personal heart for God. Help them know that God loves them deeply. Monitor how their times with God are. Bring the beauty of the outdoors to illustrate the power of God (Romans 1).

Hebrews 11:7
By faith Noah, in holy fear, built an ark to save his family. God has warned us what our family will be like if we are not spiritual. Have a holy fear of God. It’s never too late. Start today to implement being a spiritual family. Never lose hope.
Understanding Marriage part 4

I’m Looking through You: Breaking through Barriers
By Jay and Barb Shelbrack

Barriers create protection or isolation. They can ruin marriages. Our society is lonely because of the fortresses we build. So many people identify with the Simon and Garfunkle song, “I Am a Rock” because it’s all about building walls of independence.

Ephesians 2:11-18
Jesus destroys barriers and makes peace to those far and near. People can’t understand cross until they deal with sin. Think about where you were before God called you. It took breaking through barriers and walls of sin. But when you see what Jesus’ went through, it inspires us to change. God loves us and wants us to have hope and a future.

Stop looking at each other’s sin. Learn not to “put your cross down” when you get tired. Carry cross daily means to suffer to do what’s godly. A faithful spouse can shield their mate from attacks of Satan.

Guys are often trained to be tough and not admit wrongdoing. That’s pride. If you want your spouse to change, you need to change. Pride destroys growth. The quicker you deal with issues, the quicker you can change. 2 Corinthians 7 describes godly sorrow. We need this.

2 Corinthians 6:11 Must be unified in your marriage.

Ephesians 4:25
Be truthful, not false. Take off your mask in your marriage. Be honest. Lies are the termites of trust. Learn how to adjust truthfully and fit perfectly together. Embrace your differences and work together–compliment each other. That is what God intended. In marriage the goal is to become more for God together than you were separate.

Think about what would build each other up. Make your home a rest haven. Help to free each other up. What is important to your spouse needs to become important to you.

Christ adjusted for us because he loves us. He walked the earth and was vulnerable so we could imitate him. What are you willing to sacrifice for your marriage?

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The Rangas with Chris Broom

- At our 2010 marriage retreat, Steve Ranga delivers a message especially addressed to husbands so they can better meet the needs of their wives and glorify God in doing so.
- If husbands lead wives in love and righteousness, wives will lead in respect for their husbands.
- Ephesians 5:22-33 These are God’s commands for husbands and wives. We need to take the commands seriously.
- As men, we should be constantly trying to re-win our wives’ hearts. Otherwise, we will start to take them for granted and our selfishness will start to take control.

1) Realize my own selfishness.
- When I’m not trying to impress my wife with love, I’m trying to get her to serve me first. My love must be a sacrificial love.
- Leading with authority and not love leaves wives feeling desperate, bullied, unloved.
- God made a woman to respond to love and emotional intimacy with respect.
- Proverbs 30 The earth trembles at an unloved woman who is married.
- Song of Songs 5:10-16 Ask yourself… do I appreciate my wife as much as the author describes? If so, she will appreciate me. Am I working to take care of my body and keep myself attractive to her? My body belongs to her as well. Part of my sacrificial life is to be health conscious. Be neat. Women feel safe in a clean environment!

2) Maintaining a great relationship with your wife is hard work.
- Is keeping my wife emotionally satisfied a priority in my life?
- Psalm 128:3 Our wives are always growing a changing. Am I ready to serve my “new” wife? If I keep myself informed of her new changes, I will always have something new to admire and explore. If my wife is not taken care of, it is a testimony to the world I reject God.
- 1 Peter 3:7 Encouragement takes many forms: emotional, physical, spiritual. Protecting her shows love. Don’t try to “fix” your wife, just listen. This is one of her love languages.

Practical Marriage Tips
1) Kiss for at least 6 seconds. Use a long morning kiss to keep her encouraged the whole day.
2) Holding hands creates intimacy.
3) Re-enact a memorable date.
4) Dedicate a deep song to her.
5) Communicate hopes, dreams, plans with her.
6) Whisper in her ear. Make her blush.
7) Bring flowers (or something else she loves) on a regular schedule.
8) Hold her, keep close physical contact.
9) Gently touch her face, arms, back.
10) Praise her and brag about her in front of others and in personal moments.
11) Secretly prepare surprise dates (thought and effort required).
12) Don’t put your work stress onto your wife.
13) Take care of her car.
14) Compliment her.
15) Don’t forget special occasions. Plan events.
16) Maintain oral hygiene.
17) If her eyes don’t close during a kiss, she may be emotionally empty.
18) Don’t be critical and sarcastic and have a quick temper.
19) Pray before going to bed.
20) Take showers together.
21) Show patience during her period.
22) Write her love notes and poems.
23) If a situation is too emotional, write a letter.
24) Play games, have fun times together.
25) Call if you’re going to be late.
26) Take her on romantic dates.
27) Do not argue about money.
28) Be honest and tell the whole truth in situations.
29) Tell her you need her every day.
30) Do not correct her in front of others. Talk it over in a private place.
31) Have “cuddle time.” Just touch and hold.
32) Take prayer walks on a regular basis in romantic places.

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Pam and Pat Boea

Part 1. Endless Communication, taught by Jay and Barb Shelbrack

Prov 12:18 – “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing”.

What you say DOES make a difference. Not only in an argument, but Jesus always said exactly what needed to be said and chose his words carefully. BODY LANGUAGE: one can tell a lot about the discussion by watching body language. Sometimes what is not said, says a lot. Is a couple forgiving? You can tell pretty quickly.

1. MAKE IT HAPPEN.
• Talking to each other is not a luxury, talking when all is calm or perfect will not get it done.
You must make every effort to communicate daily. Talk through your schedules and the schedules of those in your sphere of influence: kids, diciplers, disciples …
• Lack of communication destroys. Make it a goal to get 15-20 minutes per day of uninterrupted conversation. Find a way to remove all distractions: TV, phone, kids, dog…
• Sin destroys: lack of openness will destroy a marriage faster than anything. Satan has you where he wants you if you are harboring secret sin.
• Resolve any conflicts before you go to bed. The best way to end the day is on a positive note.
• Talk and pray daily 2 Cor: 6:11 – “We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians, and opened wide our hearts to you.”
2. Building Trust
• Mt 5:37 – “Let your yes be yes”.
• If you say you will do something: do it. Trust is fragile and if you do not do what you day you will do, then people will not trust you: if your spouse is not trusting you, then the marriage is in trouble.
• Prov 31:11 – The wife if noble character: her husband has full confidence in her.
• Tell the truth – means tell the whole truth. Keeping something back destroys trust. The other spouse always finds out later anyway. Just get it all done right the first time.
• Prov 15:18 – A hot –tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel.
Getting angry does not bring about Gods righteousness. It also does not help the household feel secure. But being patient does solve quarrels and fights in the same household.
• Flattery has no place in communication, just speak what you want/need and remember non-verbal communication says a lot. It is better to speak clearly and let the other person know what is on your mind.

3. Vocalizing Humility

Part 2. ENDLESS ROMANCE taught by Pat and Pam Boea

1. Holy – Set apart
• Gen: God created man and women to be intimate and to feel NO SHAME (Amen).
• Intimacy and romance were created for the marriage.
• Intimacy and romance were created to give the married couple an extra bond, unifying them as God and Jesus are unified.
• What messes this up? Impurity will destroy a marriage. (Not even a hint of sexual impurity!
Eph 5:3).
• 1 Cor 7:3 Marital duty to take care of each other physically. Why? Because of our lack of self control in this area.
• However, romance is a lot more than just physical.

2. Keeping the Heat
• Song of Songs: 8:6 A mighty flame!
• Learn to meet each other’s needs. You were made specifically for each other. There are some areas where no one else in the whole world can meet the needs of your spouse except you. Do you believe God made you for each other?
• Only you can keep the flame burning for your spouse.
- Fight for date nights – make them happen and not just happen, make them a happening.
- You cannot be selfish on a date. Respect your spouse and make it all about him/her.

Prov 6:2 “All a man’s way’s seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the Lord”.
Humility CREATES unity.
We, each of us, must free ourselves from pride.
Learn to be vulnerable: without vulnerability, we become detached. Detachment is the opposite of unity. Everyone is off doing whatever he/she wants. Not Gods plan.
How are we to be vulnerable? Confess our sins to each other (2 Corinthians 6:11 open our hearts to each other).
Create an “observation/unity” with each other. It is OK to observe each other and learn about each other.
Balance – not just focusing on the negatives. Encourage each other. Know the difference between righteousness and being right. Sometimes it is better to be “wrong” than to win an argument at the expense of your spouse. Forgiveness: let it go. The Bible teaches that as far as the east is from the west is how far God is from remembering our sins. Shouldn’t we be that way with our spouse?
If unwilling to forgive, the Bible teaches that God will not forgive us.

3. Making Memories
• If you fail to plan, then you plan to fail.
A great date starts with a plan. Plan it out all day long.

It is ok to call or text “sweet nothings” to each other all day long leading to the date.
Look for something for your spouse to wear. That way you know you will be “ready”
Do things you always wanted to do. Make romantic walks a part of what you do.
Do something that is against YOUR nature, but your spouse loves to do:
Go shopping
Go fishing
Go dancing or Karaoke
Go hunting or to a ball game.
The key is that both of you feel fulfilled when the night finally ends.

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Kithy Ranga

Point 1 – What if your husband is not playing his role?
Relationship starts with sincerity. Both partners choose each other with good intentions
to be happy. A great relationship is made with 2 great forgivers! It takes a lot of work
to make a great marriage. It is not once in love, always in love.
Isaiah 48:17-18 God gave us our husband because he is the best one for us! We
compliment each other. If we pay attention to God = peace
Ephesians 5:33 – what does that mean? “Respect” means the Greek word “phabeo” or
in English to “fear” Phabeo is similar to English word Phobia. Husband is the headship.
The wife should be in fear of doing what God has ordained.
Titus 2:4-5 – a disrespectful wife dishonors God’s word (does not portray properly what
God intends) I need to look at my marriage and be in awe of God.
Ephesians 5:22-24
1 Peter 3:1-2 is the same as 1 Peter 2:18-25 (wife – husband slave – master)
Peter’s answer in 2 Peter 2:19-20 – being conscious of God helps to endure unjust
suffering
2 Timothy 3:12 1 John 5:3
How you act to your husband comes back to your relationship with God!
1 Peter 3:3-6 God’s way – when you do it God’s way it works!
Psalms 119:105 God’s word is lamp to our feet. You can “see” God’s way.
Psalm 119:165-168 God’s way = Great Peace
Endless respect = righteous thoughts
If there is bad in our thoughts, it comes out in our words/actions

Point 2 – What if Husband is sick, has physical short-coming or emotionally unstable and
can’t lead?
1 Samuel 25 – story of Abigail married to Nabal (means “fool”)
Abigail’s motives were to care for others. She became wife of David in the end.
Character: humility, sacrifice, suitable helper.
Proverbs 14:1 foolish wife tears down her home with her own hands.
Proverbs 31 – proves to be a helper – compliments her husband
Don’t look at your husband’s shortcomings, be a helper
Close to God = support husband
When your husband can’t do his job, become what he is and do the job to help him.
Airplane Analogy – husband is pilot, wife is co-pilot, kids are passengers
If pilot gets hurt, co-pilot takes over – to save family.
When you stand before God you can’t blame your husband.

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Part 2:

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Roger and Kama Parlour

1. Endless Evaluation
Proverbs 14:26 We always have to look for change in our parenting.
If we fear God we will be striving to build a secure place for our children.
Seek advice about raising our children and our marriages. Show your children how to be evangelist and Hospitable. Kids see parents and become secure based on your lifestyle.
Practical-Ask others what do you see in my children? Set up a plan to help them build Character.
Kama -Women need to stop making excuses for their kids. Example Johnny crying or acting out because he’s tired or sleepy this allows our children to be in sin.
2. Evaluate Your Spiritual Walk
- Evaluate and ask others what do you see in me.
Roger-Pride will stop us from listening to others when it comes to our kids. Pride will stop us from listening to our kids. Ask your kids how can I become a better parent? Pride has to be smashed.
Deuteronomy 6:1 Teach you children and many generations to come.
3. You must evaluate your relationship with God. Ask yourself what is changing in my life, I am I am grateful, am I humble, joyful and respectable? Are you getting input about your life? Teach your children to get input. With these practical’s your children will Love God as much as you do.
Kama- You have to have Awesome times with God. Expect your children to be Disciples. Before marriage they planned and talked about teaching the children how to love. At an early age Repentance was taught.
Roger- Deuteronomy 6:7 impress this in them. A weekly devotion is not enough for our children. You must have a daily devotional and lifestyle. You children will be taught something by their peers. We have to teach them the right things.
Deuteronomy 11: 1 Have your children memorize scripture. We have Great potential but, we have to do it Gods Way.
In closing We have to capture every moment and find out what works. Example: When our kids were young they we would look at maps of the world and have the children pick where they would want to go and plant a church, giving them a world vision.

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Steve and Kithy Ranga

You have one life and one spouse. How you live it matters.
- 2 Timothy 1:7 We have a spirit of love and power. Are you tapping into that power?
- Love that is not growing into endless love will die.
- Your life and your marriage is the only “bible” some people will ever read.
- Our personal walk with God will be key in whether or not our love for our spouse will be “endless.”
- God designed marriage. He knows what works.
- God is the middle piece at the top of the husband-wife triangle. The closer we get to God, the closer we get to each other.
- Through the help of a life long partner, we will see what we are really made of.
- Faith and love need to heal the “holes” we put in each other when we lose our temper.
- Ephesians 4:1 Pride is one of the biggest things we face in our marriage. Endless love=endless humility. Without it, you get endless grudges, strife, disrespect and emotional separation.
- Have you fulfilled or forgotten your vows?
- When we don’t love properly, husbands tend to emotionally “shut down” and wives tend to “act up.”
- Have you decided to love when she doesn’t deserve it?
- Have you decided to respect when he doesn’t deserve it?
- Proverbs 16:5, Proverbs 18:13, Proverbs 11:2, Proverbs16:8 You cannot have love and pride in the same place.
- 1 Peter 5:5 Once we get humble, it doesn’t matter whose fault it is.
- Matthew 11:29 Pride points the finger. Love embraces the responsibility.
- Love says “no” to impure thoughts. Decide that there are just some places you will not let your mind go.
- Ask yourself: “If God was in the room, would I talk to him/her that way? Well, He is.