When a woman named Denise Chiappetta asked me to study the Bible, I felt I needed “more” of God in my life, so I agreed to study with her. I loved the studies, but also knew I would have to give up my “old” way of life if I were to follow the Lord. When Denise asked me to write my spiritual goals, I discovered Psalm 119: 25-32. This Scripture confirmed to me what I needed to do to meet my spiritual goal of getting to know the Lord and eventually be with Him in heaven.

“I am laid low in the dust; preserve my life according to your word.
I recounted my ways and you answered me; teach me your decrees.
Let me understand the teaching of your precepts; then I will meditate on your wonders.
My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word.
Keep me from deceitful ways; be gracious to me through your law.
I have chosen the way of truth; I have set my heart on our laws.
I hold fast to your statues, O Lord; do not let me be put to shame.
I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free.” – Psalm 119:25-32

I felt like I was a fairly good person when I first visited the Chicago International Christian Church. However, when I heard Chris Broom preach the word, I realized I was actually breaking God’s laws. That made me feel terrible. Chris referred to those who sinned on Saturday, but then came to church on Sunday feeling righteous. That was me. I knew it was hypocritical to disobey God’s statutes during the week and then to sit in church on Sunday and expect all to be right with the Lord. It made sense that I needed to confess my sins, repent, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ. That was absolutely the only way to salvation. I so wanted to be right with the Lord.

It was not easy giving up my old life. That meant changing my lifestyle completely. I knew my decision would alienate some friends and family. In Luke 14:26, Jesus said, “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters – yes, even his own life – he cannot be my disciple.” It was clear to me I had to make God the center of my life. That meant putting Him before myself, my family, and my friends.

The night before my baptism (October 18, 2009) I wrote in my journal, “Thank you dear God for making me uncomfortable in my comfort zone, which lead me to be open to seeking You and Your graces.”

As a new disciple I am so grateful to be studying the Word daily. Now I know what I was doing wrong; now I can be obedient. It feels good to be free from the shame of my old sins. However, the Christian life is not without challenges. Some family and friends are uncertain about my new faith. Some believe the Bible is not the word of God. I become frustrated with them, and wish my faith would simply rub off on them.

In my despair, I have turned to my sister disciples who have encouraged me to be patient with the non-believers in my life. They have told me to seek what is in the hearts of non-believers to see where the objections might be coming from; to find some common ground with them; and relate their fears or concerns to my own initial fears and concerns. And to ask them to church or to study the Bible with me so they can know for themselves. I must also realize that this is a process. After all, my own conversion did not happen over night.

But ultimately, I rely on the Lord for guidance. I pray daily that He show me the best way to disciple others so they may know and love Him the way I do. And I re-read Matthew 28: 16-20, “Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. Then Jesus came to them and said, ‘All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.’”

Christine Feldmann, 2009

Categories: Testimonials
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